How many times have we left some sort of diversity training feeling bored, disconnected, and perhaps a bit guilty (but not motivated to do anything about the guilt)? How might we increase the possibility that these experiences might result in real change? I recently led a session where ten people with visual impairments wrestled with these questions, and a summary of our thoughts appears below.

I began by splitting participants into three groups and asked each group to come up with goals for a day-long diversity workshop. As they worked, I noticed some of them falling into an all-too-common trap: confusing goals (what should be accomplished) with methods (how to reach the goals).

After several minutes, I asked each group to share their goals with the rest of us; they included:

* Educating about the “business case” for diversity and “best practices”;

* Exploring what “diversity” means; and

* Enhancing communication skills and the ability to respect others.

I next asked whether they believed diversity was more about increasing knowledge or developing skills. Contradictory responses bounced off the walls.

“Why skills?” I asked, handing a microphone to a woman so that people who were hard of hearing could follow the discussion better.

“You’re trying to help people do things better,” she said.

“But,” protested a man from across the room.

“Hold on,” I said, striding over and handing him the microphone.

“People need to be given information to understand better why diversity is important,” he argued.”

“But if I’m hearing you right,” I said, “increasing knowledge is a method to motivate people to develop skills.”

After some more give and take, I argued that diversity is far more about skill development than increasing knowledge.

“So how do you increase knowledge?” I asked. Participants suggested reading, asking questions, listening to lectures, and doing research.

“And how do you develop skills?”

“Practice!” a man half-shouted from the back of the room.

“That’s right,” I agreed. “And if you spend most of your time reading about something, you may be increasing your knowledge but not increasing your ability to do that thing better. And if you spend most of your time dispensing information instead of developing skills while doing diversity work, you’re wasting everyone’s time.”

I then talked about how some organizations require up-and-coming leaders to play leadership roles in organizations serving people different from them both for PR purposes and to allow these leaders to practice working with people different from them. I talked about the reverse mentoring program I ran for a large multinational corporation where people of diverse backgrounds mentored members of their leadership team on diversity and culture change. (Additional information about this program is available in my book and at www.peteraltschul.com.)

“But?” a woman asked hesitantly.

“Yes?” I handed her the microphone.

She talked about how an organization seemed to be dragging its feet after being ordered by the federal government to hire more people with disabilities, and wanted to know how to encourage the leadership team to start moving forward. “That can be really hard,” I said quietly while thinking about encouraging our group to develop a “let’s-get-started” activity. I decided instead to point out that each of us have developed successful relationships with people different from us. “What did you do to make these relationships work?” I asked. The list the group developed included:

* Finding things in common;

* Being vulnerable;

* Being yourself; and

* Listening deeply.

“All of us want to be loved and respected,” someone said.

I pointed out that activities like this tended to draw in participants because they are reminded that each of them already have a reservoir of strengths to draw upon. “It’s much easier to build on strengths than to start from scratch,” I said, “and reminding people that they have things in common makes it more likely that they can effectively address the conflicts caused by their differences.”

“And how do feelings play into this?” a woman asked as I prepared to wrap up.

“Feelings drive actions,” I said. “Thoughts help, but feelings are the main motivators of change.”